Saturday, May 31, 2008

Michigan

I'm going on my first real work trip tomorrow. I'll be driving to Ann Arbor, MI tomorrow afternoon, & Monday I will go meet Dr. S. to talk about enzyme-mediated microamperometry experiments (sorry, just had to geek out there for a minute). It's a cool technique, & I'd like to use it, but I have to find out more about some of his lab's previous experiments (things I couldn't get in his papers) & try to convince him that its worth looking at my brain area (of interest). I'm not sure that I will be able to, but I hope that he'll find the conversation worth having.

That said, I am terrifically nervous tonight. And, apparently, alliterative. I laid in bed for almost an hour with my mind racing, then got up to blog - a la Doogie Howser. I am mostly packed, but still have to go to the lab tomorrow to work on some images. While in Ann Arbor, I'm going to give Dr. S's lab a short talk about my thesis work, and explain some of the reasoning behind the experiments I want to do. This is the part I'm afraid of, and consequently the part that I have put off the most. My current boss promised I would do this, & I am slightly annoyed at this - it was not how I wanted to spend the last two weeks, and now I feel unprepared for my discussion with this guy. And I really respect his work, and am pretty intimidated by him. But, I'll get everything done tomorrow (images in the morning in Pgh, and charts/polishing slides once I check into my hotel.) And I know it will be alright, however it turns out, I'm just still keyed up - excited, I guess.

I do feel bad that I missed a Dad's & my sister's birthdays this week - I sent an online message to my sister, but will call you both tomorrow. I love & miss you both & hope you enjoyed your days.


Now I am actually yawning, but it may be Braxton-Hicks yawns (it's a lame joke, I know, but I'm a scientist - we're where lame jokes come from). I'm going to stay up just a bit longer to make sure :)

Sunday, May 11, 2008

My Mom, Part II

My sister wrote a wonderful tribute to my mom for Mother's Day this year here. It made me cry, and also brought up lots of memories of my mom, that I'm not sure anybody out there knows. My sisters will, of course, remember some of it, but these are the things that have shaped my perception of my mom, so some of them may not be things that even they have thought about or known.

Some of them are extensions of things that Kristen said :)

My mom is silly. The "pinching heinies" thing is no joke, I actually almost told a story about it to D's parents at dinner last week, but I wasn't sure I could do it justice, and without knowing my mom, I'm not sure that other people would understand (It's a great song though, and there are funny stories too!). I don't remember her pinching all that much, but I don't remember that not happening either.

My mom also has the best laugh in the world. It's cute, but not like a fake laugh. She giggles, and it never fails to make me smile, and usually join in. My laugh is nothing like it, and I'm not sure I've ever heard anyone laugh like her, except for her mother, Betty. And she laughs alot, which may be more important.

My mom is great with kids. Part of it is that she's silly & enjoys playing. But there's so much more. My mom ran a daycare in our house when I was growing up, and it was probably the best daycare in the world. She taught all of those kids so much, not just about sharing and being nice, but about the world, and how to do things. Every day, the kids would sit in a circle, and recite the date (day of the week, day, month) and what kind of weather it was. She made a calendar with velcro slots in all the days, and cardboard tags with days, months, and weather symbols to stick on the calendar. She'd choose kids to pick out the right tags, and let them put it on the calendar while everyone said the words. Those kids were so excited and proud to be the one putting up the tags, which I think are the two emotions that my mom is so good at instilling in kids. She is great at creating opportunities for people to be amazed at what they can do. I think this is what empowerment is, and I feel like this is one of the great gifts that I got from my mom. Feeling like anything is possible for myself, if I work hard enough at it, and keep trying, has influenced my view of other people so that I see the possibilities of what they can do and want them to have the opportunities to discover what they are capable of. I think this is what life is all about, seeing what you can make from the circumstances that you run across, and I think more people need to have this view of life.

My mom also can make pretty much anything she needs. When we were small, she made our clothes. She always had craft books, so that we would have things to do in the summer. She never pushed us aside, so that she could show us how to do it better. She always let us learn by doing it ourselves. (At least I never remember her doing this. This is excellent training for scientists, by the way, because it teaches you how to evaluate what you are doing, and think of a better way to do it). She would bake cookies, cakes, muffins, etc., and always had us help by measuring and adding ingredients. She did this with the daycare kids, too. And, as Kristen mentioned, she always had us help with Thanksgiving dinner. I always felt so privileged to be given something important to do, and to be included in the group of women who were preparing food for the day. I still believe strongly in the value of shared work in building personal bonds, and I find it so satisfying to do things in the service of other people (okay, not always, but in my better moments, when I know some humility, and grace).

My mom raised us to pull our own weight. This was perhaps the hardest thing to take as a child, but perhaps it was the most important. I imagine it may have been one of the hardest things to implement as a mother. I'm sure there was a lot of whining about it. We got added to the chore list young, (maybe at 5?), and everyone had something to do each week. One of my earliest memories is of going to get my mom so that I could show her that I changed the sheets on my bed, by myself. I think I was 4. I had the shock of my life at 22, when I realized that some people didn't know that you were supposed to change the sheets on your bed every week. Or at all, for that matter. My mom taught us to be capable - cooking, cleaning, personal care - all the stuff that you need to know how to do to run your own house as an adult, even if it's just you living in it.

And, through chores & other things, my mom gave me my sisters. I may not always get along with everyone in my family at one time, but it's amazing to me to think about the fact that my sisters have known me since I was born, and can probably remember me being born. They have looked out for me most of my life, & still support me emotionally. Plus, they are just some of the coolest women I've ever met.

Okay, it's taken me over a week to get this posted, so I will curtail it a little bit, in the interest of getting it published in the first place. But maybe there'll be updates :)

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Meme (shoot, i don't know how to write pronounciations, it's like miasma, but take out the 'as'. and the uh at the end, meme)

Well, the dumpster weight came back at 5.49 tons. That sounds really impressive, until I reveal that it rained pretty hard the night before they picked up the dumpster, so all the plaster inside of it soaked up enough water to probably increase the weight by at least 1.49 tons. Which makes me wonder why Noah didn't just remodel his house right before the flood, and let the plaster soak up all of that water. Not trying to be blasphemous, but I've got to keep the jokes coming in this family.

Shaun tagged me for a meme, so here goes:

I will:

1)use as many colons as possible in this post (just kidding, that's not part of the meme, ooh, and a typo just revealed to me how to spell meme phonetically - it's meem!)

No, really this time:

1. Write the title to your own memoir using 6 words.
2. Post it on your blog.
3. Link to the person that tagged you.
4. Tag five more blogs.

So, 6 words isn't really enough, but I'll eliminate the first two I wanted to use, since they only refer to the last 5 years of my life. And what I'm left with pretty much describes most of my life anyway, so perhaps it's better that way. Here's mine:

It seemed like a good idea...

It was originally going to be: Grad School: It seemed like a good idea. But, when I think about it, this applies to most of the decisions I've made. So it's gonna stick. I could come up with something extremely science-dorky, but then no-one but other science dorks would even consider reading the book, and I wouldn't make Clinton-style money off of my memoirs. And I'd probly get angry letters from scientists that I forgot to cite, because they too had a bad time in grad school, and they went before me, so I must have plagiarized my disillusionment from them.

Actually things in science-land have not been so bad lately, I gave an anatomy talk yesterday that went over well - even though the consensus in the end was that I have a talent for choosing really hard questions that look really easy in the beginning, and that no-one else in their right mind would want to do this particular project. And we can argue back and forth on the right way to do it, but as our department chair said, "It basically comes down to what you feel is good enough".

Otherwise, not much to update, I'm going to try to work in the yard today, and catch up on family calls: first on the list is Johanna (i have your cell phone number and am not afraid to use it). I just have to find my phone, and discover its not charged, charge it, then forget who I wanted to call, and end up doing the same thing tomorrow. To all the mothers out there - I hope you have a wonderful mother's day, you are the most amazing women I know (okay, that goes more for the mothers that I am related to), and I love you very much.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Dumpster 7/8 full

Well, it's mostly done. We ripped out almost all of the plaster & lath in the kitchen (and found out we had a dropped ceiling. We ripped out all the plaster & lath in the 2nd floor, front room (and exposed the brick chimney of the front stack, which is in really good shape, considering its age).
We ripped out almost all of the plaster & lath in the 2nd floor, middle room. And we hauled it out, bucket by bucket, down 30-something steps & into the dumpster. My back, arms, shoulders and legs are all making their presence more noticeable today. But it's done!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I can't wait to get back to the lab. This stuff is kind of fun, but i wouldn't want to do it for a living.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Taken out by a virus

Well, I've contracted a lovely late spring (or is it only mid-Spring) cold. I always forget just how miserable a runny nose, runny eyes, and dry cough can be. But I slept most of the weekend (before all the fun mucous-making started), and spent Tuesday through Thursday laid up most of the time too. Which makes me feel guilty that I'm taking next week as vacation - I feel I should make up for the days I missed this week.

But, with the dumpster coming, I know there won't be time or energy left for work next week.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Thesis Update

So.... I emerged unscathed from my thesis progress meeting. I even got a couple of comments along the lines of, "Great meeting, Ericka" and other such niceties. I guess I have turned into one of those people that complains all the time about how poorly they're doing, but really they're doing fine. At least I honestly believe I'm doing a crappy job though! (Hmmm.... although that doesn't say much for the pride I take in my work I guess. Maybe I'm just too critical?)

And, the even better news is that one of my projects just got a whole lot easier! I was facing a big analysis problem - trying to get software to do something that it wasn't originally designed to do - and my committee basically told me to use a much easier method, that I was making things too hard on myself. So, that project should be done by this summer - woohoo!

In house news - I've obtained a dumpster permit (so that we can have one parked on the street, as we have no driveway), and will be calling to schedule a dumpster in a little while. Last Thursday, after my meeting was done, I planted my two new daylillies - Pardon Me Daylillies, from Gurney, they're bright magenta with orange-ish insides), and transplanted a bunch of the earlier seedlings (tomatoes, and some flowers whose names are eluding me right now), and moved them upstairs to get on a natural light schedule. Tonight I'll probably start some more seeds in the basement, and once it gets warmer we can start preparing the vegetable/flower beds for outdoor planting. The cats are great, the little black&white one now curls up beside me just about any time I sit down (very cute, but also annoying, she always lays in a way that I know must be uncomfortable for her), and the calico has resumed her post in the window, looking at the birds on the feeder (which D refilled for her enjoyment). I got a birdbath for Easter as well, so I'm hoping maybe one of the cats will figure out that it's fun to stalk/catch birds. But I'm not expecting great things - the cats are wonderfully fuzzy, but not too bright. As I guess most cats are.

Otherwise, not much happening. We had a very lazy weekend - although I did roast some garlic & make cajun tuna on saturday. Sunday, D spent organizing his giant piles of paper in preparation to do his taxes, which will probably not get done by the deadline (I think this is the way he's most like my dad, and I can't get him to accept the fact that there is no way that his ATM receipts for the last 5 years are going to yield anything that is legally deductible; he's convinced that he's going to find something that will mean he won't have to pay anything. I think it's more important to actually file them, but what do I know? I've only filed taxes & not ended up owing them tons of money in fees and interest for the last 15 years. Oh, and I always do my taxes both ways, and realize every year that it's easier & better financially for me to take the standard deduction). I guess the only part of this that really irks me is the belief that somehow he shouldn't have to pay taxes. And the griping about it. In true hyperbolic fashion, he goes on and on about how he would have been better off not to have worked, because the government takes so much. Not in his current job, but one of the self-employed contracts he did last year. I have to point out to him that they only take 25%, and that that still leaves him with a refund coming, plus he got the money for doing the work in the first place!!!! Sometimes I really hate the libertarian crap that comes spouting out of him, and would like to strangle the idiot friends of his that spouted it in the first place. (I place this in the same category as the "My parents didn't pay for me to go to college" crap - just a lot of self-pity by somebody that isn't actually any worse off that 95% of the people in this country, but wants to feel wronged somehow) But I digress.....

Tax time means the economic stimulus checks will be mailed soon! I hate the idea of these - W bribed everyone on the way in, and on the way out - but am not going to turn down the check. Neither will I be stimulating the economy with it. Just paying off bills, but it will still be nice to do that. I did however, just pick up a compound miter saw off of ebay for a reasonable amount of money. (The features I wanted, but about 1/2 price of a new Dewalt 12" single-bevel compound miter saw). I can't wait until it gets here! And we can cut trim for our bathroom! I have become the most boring person in the world - I'm taking a week's vacation to gut the 2nd floor of the house, and am excited about a new-ish saw. But I can't help it, i've been waiting a long time to do this stuff!

All right, I should get back to something productive. I hope you all had a fabulous weekend, & I get to talk to you soon!

Ericka

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

How is it April already????

Well, apparently it has been several weeks since I've posted. So I'm trying to remedy that. Unfortunately, not much has been happening except school related stuff. I finished my written progress report last Friday & sent it off - I'm not happy with the way it turned out, but I worked on it for ~ 2 weeks, so I'm not sure how much more I could expect. Hopefully, I won't be yelled at too badly come Thursday (when my progress meeting is). So today, I'm working from home, trying to get my presentation done, & to fill in some of the things that I didn't discuss in the written report.

In good news, I had a new publication come out. I didn't write it (and wasn't kept in the loop, even for the methods section.... grrrr!), but at least I got something else with my name on it.

http://www.pnas.org/cgi/content/abstract/105/11/4405

And, having the immunogold-silver measurement of transporter incorporation into plasmamembrane published helps to validate this method for my own thesis stuff, so hopefully it will be easier to publish my own papers later.

Unfortunately, I haven't made much thesis progress in the last year. I've worked out a lot of methods, but haven't got all that much data yet. So I'm dreading this meeting, but also strangely looking forward to it. If somebody would just yell at me, tell me I'm not getting enough done, then I feel like I might actually be a little more motivated. But, only time will tell....

In house news, well, it's pretty much the same. We got a new (to us) futon this weekend, and I came up with another idea for a TV show. D keeps a running list, because he wants to produce short segments for internet or broadcast (y'know, should he even find himself owning a low-power TV station). So we have things like ghetto gourmet (cooking show featuring ramen noodles, grilled cheese, falafel, etc.), and the new one is a home show (think HGTV). This one is called "Let's move this couch!". Hopefully, you can guess the premise. Large, unwieldy couches, a couple of people, and maneuvering the couch around small spaces.

But, we'll be getting a dumpster delivered later in the month, and I'll start removing large amounts of plaster & lath. Plus, we'll be able to get rid of a bunch of trash that's been hanging out at our house for a couple of years now :)

Our plants are doing pretty well. I transplanted a bunch of tomatoes, zinnias, delphinium, and coreopsis on Sunday, and did some clean-up around the yard. I also scooped out all the ashes from our fireplace, and mixed them in with our compost and some of our vegetable beds. With any luck, I'll be able to put plants outside in a couple of weeks. I'm taking a week off at the end of April, for the dumpster, and also for my own sanity. I've been working all week, and most weekends for a long time, so it'll be nice to have a full week of not doing any school-related work.

Sadly, I won't be able to make it to Massachusetts for my nephew's birthday. It's the second year in a row that I've had to skip it, but I will be seeing him in August, so I'll have to just make do with that (and my calendar, which makes me smile every day).

Okay, well, I have to get back to doing work, so that'll be it for now. I hope you all have a good week!