I felt bad about all the negativity from Friday's post, especially since it was very gray outside & that never does good things to my mindset/perspective on things. Even though I took the post down, I still felt I should balance it with some of the good things about science/academia that I can come up with (assuming, of course, that I feel like acknowleding them). So in my quest to be more positive, here goes:
1) I get to work on some very cool things, and in general I don't have anyone telling me what to do. Granted, this has also been the source of alot of bad feelings on my part about grad school, but overall, I don't have to do things that I think are unethical simply because it's good for business, or anything like that. I know many people would have objections to the animal research I do, but it is heavily regulated & most of the researchers I know are concerned with animal welfare first before other considerations. Maybe we've had to be forced into it, but at this point in time, most scientists really do care about the comfort and well-being of their subjects (and not just because it leads to better data). At the very least, most of them grapple with the ethical issues surrounding their research on a regular basis. We get pretty upset if our animals aren't doing well (at least I do).
2) Despite my complaining about lack of job opportunities, I've done pretty well for myself so far. While I look back at my decision making as being pretty uninformed (or focusing on the wrong things), I ended up at a well-respected college that didn't bankrupt me. I'm in a grad program that's in the top 10 for my field in the U.S., and I'm going on to a very well-respected lab (and deserving of that respect) for a post-doc. I can't admit it very often, but I am excited to go train with the new mentor. I hope that my work will improve a lot over the next few years.
3) Despite the general complaining of Ph.D.s on the internets re: lack of well-paying jobs, research science professor jobs are more plentiful than liberal arts ones, so I've got an advantage there. If I decide to go the professor route, it doesn't have to be at a big research-heavy university. Slower-paced lifestyle is possible, and the non-financial perks of working in academia are pretty good (relaxed hours, work-from-home options, tuition benefits, discounts in community, summers off (sometimes)). Plus, if you can get in in the first place, job security is pretty good, though acquiring tenure requires an awful lot of upfront investment (~10 years of solid 100+ hr weeks & just pushing to get as much cranked out as possible). And who knows? Maybe I can float back and forth between industry/academia a bit.
4) Opportunity to travel. And not just for conferences or vacations. It sometimes seems a onerous to have to pick up and move for this or that opportunity, and it stinks to leave behind friendships that have been a big part of the past 7 years, but I always did want to live in different places. I doubt I could have predicted Pittsburgh, or Nashville as places I would end up, but I am so glad I got to experience Pittsburgh (a really great little city) and I'm sure Nashville is going to turn out to be a positive experience too. I am a little disappointed to not be moving back to a major (i.e coastal) city, but I'm glad there are places I can live that I can actually live within my means on an academic salary. I'm also glad I discovered that there are places that are much cheaper than New England (it sounds weird to me now, but I honestly didn't grasp just how much more expensive Boston-New York-Washington (heck, even Plymouth & Providence) are than other parts of the country.)
And of course, I didn't really realize that mountains in PA are a totally different breed than the ones in Western MA. And the plant life! New England is pretty & picturesque; PA flora is just so virulently alive - you can literally see the vines & other plants swallow houses, lots, etc within a couple of seasons. This makes for more frustrating gardening, but it's really amazing & inspires awe in me. Next I will be in the foothills of Appalachia, and I'm sure there will be lots of new-to-me nature to take in.
Of course, I still hope to get back to something a little more urbane, and luckily the academic thing offers a lot on that front. I'm already taking a harder look at fellowship opportunities in Germany & France, D even said he might consider Sweden (apparently the availability of disgusting fish treats may outweigh the cold & dark thing), though I'd prefer someplace I haven't been before. That won't be cheap, but how many people get to live & work in foreign countries for a few years?
5) I get to talk with scientists. For many people, that would not be a great thing. And yes, some of them can be snooty and awful. But then there are the people who practically wet themselves because they are, "Just. So. Excited. About.Science". These are the ones who run to the white board. Their eyes light up when they talk about what other people in the field are doing (not just their own stuff). They are engaged and engaging intellectually, and many can appreciate the humor in their own quirks, and in the weird conversations that come up in the course of their job. We embrace and celebrate our dorkitude, and then go off to discuss the neuroscience of zombies* over beer. It's pretty fun (sometimes).
* um, yeah, I've honestly had this conversation. It veered into how you would have to engineer the zombie virus to selectively inactivate different parts of the brain & which regions would have to be left intact. No-one participating in that conversation actually engineers viruses, so it was purely theoretical, I swear.
So I feel better about things today (obviously), and I'm almost done with the 3rd revision of my talk. In less than 48 hours, I should be done with everything, and hopefully celebrating the good outcome :)
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to try grad school....
I actually sing this to myself when I'm getting out of the car some days. Partially cause I like Willie Nelson, and it's fun to sing country in an overly vibratto way. But also because it's so, so true.
I try to wrap it in wry humor (because it is supremely funny in an objective, universe-sized way) but at some point I had to come to terms with the fact that I was doing this to myself. Grad school is a deep, dark, lonely swamp of self-doubt and confusion, and having to fake it. But no-one made me go, and no-one really made me stay through to the end (-ish). So I had to accept that no matter how anxiety ridden I am, it is self-inflicted. Which makes you really think about why you're doing it.
I can't say I've figured that out. I think in the end, I am addicted to thinking about the brain. I get to a point where I don't want to know anymore (I think things are now just getting knocked out of there whenever I manage to remember anything new), but then I hear about something on the radio, or a new idea just pops into my mind, and I'm back reading papers and my mind is cranking again.
To me it's like Gorgonzola. I think that I don't like it, but I'm not sure, so I have to try it a little bit more. I'm intrigued by the experience.
The last six weeks were very trying intellectually, but especially emotionally. I still feel embarassed about my document - there are at least 3 very weak sections that were written too close to the end, and that I wasn't thinking clearly about when I wrote them - but am trying to just press on with my defense. I'll worry about the written part later, since I expect there will be revision.
Send all the good thoughts/prayers/wishes you can out toward Southwestern PA. I'll let everyone know how it goes.
I try to wrap it in wry humor (because it is supremely funny in an objective, universe-sized way) but at some point I had to come to terms with the fact that I was doing this to myself. Grad school is a deep, dark, lonely swamp of self-doubt and confusion, and having to fake it. But no-one made me go, and no-one really made me stay through to the end (-ish). So I had to accept that no matter how anxiety ridden I am, it is self-inflicted. Which makes you really think about why you're doing it.
I can't say I've figured that out. I think in the end, I am addicted to thinking about the brain. I get to a point where I don't want to know anymore (I think things are now just getting knocked out of there whenever I manage to remember anything new), but then I hear about something on the radio, or a new idea just pops into my mind, and I'm back reading papers and my mind is cranking again.
To me it's like Gorgonzola. I think that I don't like it, but I'm not sure, so I have to try it a little bit more. I'm intrigued by the experience.
The last six weeks were very trying intellectually, but especially emotionally. I still feel embarassed about my document - there are at least 3 very weak sections that were written too close to the end, and that I wasn't thinking clearly about when I wrote them - but am trying to just press on with my defense. I'll worry about the written part later, since I expect there will be revision.
Send all the good thoughts/prayers/wishes you can out toward Southwestern PA. I'll let everyone know how it goes.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Revision
I learned in grade school/high school that the way one wrote a paper was to: 1) make an outline; 2)write a first draft; 3)Revise/edit; and 4) write final draft.
Throughout college, I aspired to this, but never really made it to that ideal. Usually, it was more like:
1) Take notes on stuff you read.
2) Think about it alot.
3) Realize this paper is due in two weeks, start outline.
4) Continue making outlines for different sections during all spare moments in between classes, while eating, procrastinating from doing other assignments. Make sure to put all the outlines on different pieces of paper, so you can misplace some of them. Accumulate a pile of reference material and various pieces of handwritten ideas somewhere near the desk region of dorm room.
5) Realize paper is due in a week, write new outline electronically. Start panicking.
6) Write furiously, and edit individual sections as you go along. Sometimes, I did get a full draft written before revising, but not most of the time.
7) During revision, decide that you don't even like the direction that one argument is going, and end up printing 10x the number of pages in the final paper, because there were just that many versions.
Unless, of course it was finals week, and there was simply no time. I have written 10-15 page papers in only 1 or 2 days. Luckily, they were things I had read for & thought about quite a bit, but I shudder to think how rough they were writing-wise.
It is not much better now.
Grad school writing has been pretty awful for me, particularly because my final thesis projects have ended up being very different from the entire set I had envisioned when I was proposing my thesis topic. So while these projects were all part of that plan, the ones that were discarded along the way were ones that really addressed the main theme of my original topic. I am left with three studies that are difficult to synthesize into one larger body of work.
I think I have figured out how to argue what I'm arguing, although its not the flashiest idea ever, but writing about it has been difficult. I think the situation is made more difficult by the fact that I've written so many different variations on aspects of choline transporter, having to break up certain mental associations with what the evidence in the literature means & use some of the same sources as evidence for something else. I also keep re-discovering papers I've read in the past & having to sit and skim over them again.
My own worst tendency is that I go looking for some citation for a very specific statement I want to make (and one that I know is a valid statement/idea) and get lost in the papers that come up in a search. On the one hand, it keeps me reading broadly, but I feel like grad school has been a constant struggle between breadth and depth of knowledge. And, coming back to writing, I have really had a hard time restricting what I write to relevant facts, and not slipping into trivia mode.
So far, it seems that the thesis-writing is an entirely new thing, and my writing habits are very different than usual with this. I'm essentially almost finished with another manuscript for submission (that becomes a chapter of my thesis), I'm pulling together another one, and writing a biggish introduction. I have not started the monster discussion section yet. I'm still scared of it.
The introduction has changed a lot, and I've been editing segments as I go along. Right now I have the first 5 pages done through 2 drafts, another 5 page section going through its second edit now, a third section that needs some expansion but can probably be in good shape with one day's work, and probably another 5-8 pages to write to connect them all into a decent argument.
Of course there are figures to pull together too, but many of these are almost done (at least for the dissertation; for publication of my last study, I still need to collect a little more data next week, then spend some time analyzing, but that can be done at a lower priority than finishing the beast of a written document).
So, busy busy busy here on my end. Another 6 weeks.
Throughout college, I aspired to this, but never really made it to that ideal. Usually, it was more like:
1) Take notes on stuff you read.
2) Think about it alot.
3) Realize this paper is due in two weeks, start outline.
4) Continue making outlines for different sections during all spare moments in between classes, while eating, procrastinating from doing other assignments. Make sure to put all the outlines on different pieces of paper, so you can misplace some of them. Accumulate a pile of reference material and various pieces of handwritten ideas somewhere near the desk region of dorm room.
5) Realize paper is due in a week, write new outline electronically. Start panicking.
6) Write furiously, and edit individual sections as you go along. Sometimes, I did get a full draft written before revising, but not most of the time.
7) During revision, decide that you don't even like the direction that one argument is going, and end up printing 10x the number of pages in the final paper, because there were just that many versions.
Unless, of course it was finals week, and there was simply no time. I have written 10-15 page papers in only 1 or 2 days. Luckily, they were things I had read for & thought about quite a bit, but I shudder to think how rough they were writing-wise.
It is not much better now.
Grad school writing has been pretty awful for me, particularly because my final thesis projects have ended up being very different from the entire set I had envisioned when I was proposing my thesis topic. So while these projects were all part of that plan, the ones that were discarded along the way were ones that really addressed the main theme of my original topic. I am left with three studies that are difficult to synthesize into one larger body of work.
I think I have figured out how to argue what I'm arguing, although its not the flashiest idea ever, but writing about it has been difficult. I think the situation is made more difficult by the fact that I've written so many different variations on aspects of choline transporter, having to break up certain mental associations with what the evidence in the literature means & use some of the same sources as evidence for something else. I also keep re-discovering papers I've read in the past & having to sit and skim over them again.
My own worst tendency is that I go looking for some citation for a very specific statement I want to make (and one that I know is a valid statement/idea) and get lost in the papers that come up in a search. On the one hand, it keeps me reading broadly, but I feel like grad school has been a constant struggle between breadth and depth of knowledge. And, coming back to writing, I have really had a hard time restricting what I write to relevant facts, and not slipping into trivia mode.
So far, it seems that the thesis-writing is an entirely new thing, and my writing habits are very different than usual with this. I'm essentially almost finished with another manuscript for submission (that becomes a chapter of my thesis), I'm pulling together another one, and writing a biggish introduction. I have not started the monster discussion section yet. I'm still scared of it.
The introduction has changed a lot, and I've been editing segments as I go along. Right now I have the first 5 pages done through 2 drafts, another 5 page section going through its second edit now, a third section that needs some expansion but can probably be in good shape with one day's work, and probably another 5-8 pages to write to connect them all into a decent argument.
Of course there are figures to pull together too, but many of these are almost done (at least for the dissertation; for publication of my last study, I still need to collect a little more data next week, then spend some time analyzing, but that can be done at a lower priority than finishing the beast of a written document).
So, busy busy busy here on my end. Another 6 weeks.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Once a month seems to be the natural frequency
of my blogging.
Forgive the late post, I did have a couple of drafts started, but it's been a very hectic month. I had my last thesis committee meeting before my dissertation defense on Friday morning, and turned in a 41 page report the week before that. That was the short version, too. So, I've been busy.
But, the good news is that I've been approved to go ahead writing & organize a defense date. I had asked for 8 weeks to write, but my committee said I'd need more (which is fine with me, I didn't want to seem like I was asking for too much time, but truthfully, I'm sure I'll need it). The longer timeline also will make scheduling people easier, as it'll be after the start of the academic fall term, not right on the tail end of the summer break. I guess the only downside is that I'll miss having any time off before moving to TN, unless I ask for another 2-4 week reprieve on my start date at the new job.
After the whole meeting, I took the weekend for myself, and D & I prepped the walls & ceiling in the front two rooms for painting. We also managed a trip to Home Depot in which we pretty much purchased only the items we needed for this one job. Everything's pretty much sanded, and more than 1/2 of the trim has been taped, so we're in better shape than I thought we'd be & painting will probably happen soon.
Today I stayed home, but I finished my work goal, and did a little bit of organizational thought about what I need to accomplish in the next few weeks. Still, I'm already overcome by the feeling that I'm not working hard enough, that I'm behind on this deadline, so this is not going to be a fun three months. Oh well, at the end of it, I'll be a Dr.
Forgive the late post, I did have a couple of drafts started, but it's been a very hectic month. I had my last thesis committee meeting before my dissertation defense on Friday morning, and turned in a 41 page report the week before that. That was the short version, too. So, I've been busy.
But, the good news is that I've been approved to go ahead writing & organize a defense date. I had asked for 8 weeks to write, but my committee said I'd need more (which is fine with me, I didn't want to seem like I was asking for too much time, but truthfully, I'm sure I'll need it). The longer timeline also will make scheduling people easier, as it'll be after the start of the academic fall term, not right on the tail end of the summer break. I guess the only downside is that I'll miss having any time off before moving to TN, unless I ask for another 2-4 week reprieve on my start date at the new job.
After the whole meeting, I took the weekend for myself, and D & I prepped the walls & ceiling in the front two rooms for painting. We also managed a trip to Home Depot in which we pretty much purchased only the items we needed for this one job. Everything's pretty much sanded, and more than 1/2 of the trim has been taped, so we're in better shape than I thought we'd be & painting will probably happen soon.
Today I stayed home, but I finished my work goal, and did a little bit of organizational thought about what I need to accomplish in the next few weeks. Still, I'm already overcome by the feeling that I'm not working hard enough, that I'm behind on this deadline, so this is not going to be a fun three months. Oh well, at the end of it, I'll be a Dr.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Hot Salsa, Chocolate-Ginger Cookies, and French Bread
After a few weeks hiatus due to just-too-much-work, the Pittsburgh cookie railroad is back on track (ha! I managed to squeeze a pun-like thing in there). I promised to make cookies this week, but didn't feel quite up to the curry cardamom gems that I made last time. And then ate all of them, so I had nothing to deliver. I wanted something chocolate-y, but not chocolate chip. Something exotic.
I had purchased some candied ginger a few weeks ago, at my local Indian grocery. I had plenty of cocoa and chocolate squares, so I went to the trusty Internets and searched for something chocolate and ginger. And I found these:
Chocolate-Ginger Crinkle Cookies
I made up the dough, with minor changes. Just the usual, I didn't have quite enough chocolate, Drew wanted more brown sugar, etc. The dough was really liquidy, more like brownie dough, but I remembered that the regular chocolate crinkles are also like this, so I didn't try to fix it at all.
This morning, the dough was hard as a rock. More like fudge. So, I carved it up a teaspoonful at a time, and set to work baking. They came out awesome!!! I'll definitely be making these again.
Prior to the start of the cookies, I was struggling to come up with something for dinner. I made Indian earlier in the week, so that was out. We thought about grilling, but we need a new chimney coal starter thing, and our local True Value only had a gigantic, overpriced one. (We did pick up a bunch of new plants and some mushroom compost though, so I have a few veggies planted and happy in the back.)
We settled on chicken tacos, but I was out of most veggies that go into my usual salsa. I did have some canned tomatoes from two summers ago, but I was hesitant to use them. They're whole yellow grape and red cherry tomatoes, but I included 1/2 a habanero pepper in each jar, and from previous experience, this made everything I used them in unbearably hot, even when the habanero was not removed prior to cooking.
I ground them up anyway, and threw some fresh garden oregano, onion, and cilantro. It was still insanely hot, but seemed like it was still useable. The rest of the tacos is pretty standard - I use the packet method, and soft corn tortillas - but they were great! The salsa hotness mellowed after sitting for a while, and the taco seasoning stuff worked pretty well to tamp down more of the heat. So I know at least one more use for the remaining two jars sitting in my cupboard.
While the cookies were baking this morning, I got started on some more baguettes, but tried out King Arthur's bread flour and Fannie Farmer's recipe. It's always a challenge for me to not overknead the bread, especially since my trusty Kitchen-Aid mixer tends to make kneading unnecessary anyway. Dough is in first rising now, and my fingers are crossed that it will come out well :)
I had purchased some candied ginger a few weeks ago, at my local Indian grocery. I had plenty of cocoa and chocolate squares, so I went to the trusty Internets and searched for something chocolate and ginger. And I found these:
Chocolate-Ginger Crinkle Cookies
I made up the dough, with minor changes. Just the usual, I didn't have quite enough chocolate, Drew wanted more brown sugar, etc. The dough was really liquidy, more like brownie dough, but I remembered that the regular chocolate crinkles are also like this, so I didn't try to fix it at all.
This morning, the dough was hard as a rock. More like fudge. So, I carved it up a teaspoonful at a time, and set to work baking. They came out awesome!!! I'll definitely be making these again.
Prior to the start of the cookies, I was struggling to come up with something for dinner. I made Indian earlier in the week, so that was out. We thought about grilling, but we need a new chimney coal starter thing, and our local True Value only had a gigantic, overpriced one. (We did pick up a bunch of new plants and some mushroom compost though, so I have a few veggies planted and happy in the back.)
We settled on chicken tacos, but I was out of most veggies that go into my usual salsa. I did have some canned tomatoes from two summers ago, but I was hesitant to use them. They're whole yellow grape and red cherry tomatoes, but I included 1/2 a habanero pepper in each jar, and from previous experience, this made everything I used them in unbearably hot, even when the habanero was not removed prior to cooking.
I ground them up anyway, and threw some fresh garden oregano, onion, and cilantro. It was still insanely hot, but seemed like it was still useable. The rest of the tacos is pretty standard - I use the packet method, and soft corn tortillas - but they were great! The salsa hotness mellowed after sitting for a while, and the taco seasoning stuff worked pretty well to tamp down more of the heat. So I know at least one more use for the remaining two jars sitting in my cupboard.
While the cookies were baking this morning, I got started on some more baguettes, but tried out King Arthur's bread flour and Fannie Farmer's recipe. It's always a challenge for me to not overknead the bread, especially since my trusty Kitchen-Aid mixer tends to make kneading unnecessary anyway. Dough is in first rising now, and my fingers are crossed that it will come out well :)
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Good news, everyone!
Most of the last month has been all-about-work for me, either doing it (a lot of imaging on two projects), or stressing out about it (am I making the right decision? Is it going to be enjoyable, or am I going to regret taking an academic post-doc? Or this academic post-doc?) As you can see, my anxiety talent is in over-drive, as usual.
Thankfully, this was broken up by a great visit home for my nephew's birthday. We had lots of cake, a fun time at the birthday place (with slides & lots of inflatable obstacle courses, a museum (where I made full use of my student discount) with bugs & rocks & things & a primo parking spot in Cambridge, lots of games, rock-climbing, & a nice visit with my Dad. I didn't look at any work-related stuff at all, & I came back relaxed & refreshed.
This relaxation was only slightly interrupted at the end of my return trip, when I cam bounding out of the airport, only to realize, I couldn't find my car. I had been runninng late when I got to the airport Thursday morning, and many of the Extended parking spots near the terminal were full. I didn't want to park 1/2 mile away, so I drove to the far side of the entrance & found a good place. Ran into the terminal, and didn't write down the location. D'oh!
But, I did rehearse the location several times (14d, 14d, 14d...) to get it into my head. The only problem is that area 14d was to my right when I exited the airport, and I remembered turning to my right to approach the airport when I came in. I wandered around several regions of the parking lot, unable to get the spatial location, remembered information, and direction of parking spaces to come together the right way. Finally, I went to inspect area 14d, and immediately found my car. The only upside is that I thought quite a bit about the different kinds of memory that we have, and the fact that these types of memory may be encoded/retrieved by brain circuitry that is largely segregated (a topic that is relevant to my dissertation). So, I guess I did do a little bit of work, but not too much :)
At my first day back to work, I collected a ton of imaging data. I have 60 stacks to collect in total, and as of today, I've made it through 42 of them. With two more days to image, I think I should have this project pretty well wrapped up. I'm not entirely sure how to analyze this data, but I'll figure something out.
My other project (which was finished, until we decided to add more cases), has a couple of weeks of imaging left on it, and maybe another month of counting cells. Then, write everything up, have a committee meeting, schedule a due date/defense date, clean up all my notes (including copying them, and reorganizing by topic, not date), and move to Nashville. I'm trying to get down there by the beginning of October, and not relishing how crazy my last month or so in Pittsburgh is going to be.
The good news is that I was selected for a fellowship in Neurogenomics. I have to giggle just a lit bit whenever I say that, as it seems like something someone much smarter would have on their CV. But it's going on mine. It basically just covers my salary & gives me some travel money, and requires me to do a few extra meetings & seminars during the year. And, of course, looks good on paper. So, I'll take it, even if it provokes quite a bit of anxiety over whether I'm taking an opportunity from someone who is more deserving.
Thankfully, this was broken up by a great visit home for my nephew's birthday. We had lots of cake, a fun time at the birthday place (with slides & lots of inflatable obstacle courses, a museum (where I made full use of my student discount) with bugs & rocks & things & a primo parking spot in Cambridge, lots of games, rock-climbing, & a nice visit with my Dad. I didn't look at any work-related stuff at all, & I came back relaxed & refreshed.
This relaxation was only slightly interrupted at the end of my return trip, when I cam bounding out of the airport, only to realize, I couldn't find my car. I had been runninng late when I got to the airport Thursday morning, and many of the Extended parking spots near the terminal were full. I didn't want to park 1/2 mile away, so I drove to the far side of the entrance & found a good place. Ran into the terminal, and didn't write down the location. D'oh!
But, I did rehearse the location several times (14d, 14d, 14d...) to get it into my head. The only problem is that area 14d was to my right when I exited the airport, and I remembered turning to my right to approach the airport when I came in. I wandered around several regions of the parking lot, unable to get the spatial location, remembered information, and direction of parking spaces to come together the right way. Finally, I went to inspect area 14d, and immediately found my car. The only upside is that I thought quite a bit about the different kinds of memory that we have, and the fact that these types of memory may be encoded/retrieved by brain circuitry that is largely segregated (a topic that is relevant to my dissertation). So, I guess I did do a little bit of work, but not too much :)
At my first day back to work, I collected a ton of imaging data. I have 60 stacks to collect in total, and as of today, I've made it through 42 of them. With two more days to image, I think I should have this project pretty well wrapped up. I'm not entirely sure how to analyze this data, but I'll figure something out.
My other project (which was finished, until we decided to add more cases), has a couple of weeks of imaging left on it, and maybe another month of counting cells. Then, write everything up, have a committee meeting, schedule a due date/defense date, clean up all my notes (including copying them, and reorganizing by topic, not date), and move to Nashville. I'm trying to get down there by the beginning of October, and not relishing how crazy my last month or so in Pittsburgh is going to be.
The good news is that I was selected for a fellowship in Neurogenomics. I have to giggle just a lit bit whenever I say that, as it seems like something someone much smarter would have on their CV. But it's going on mine. It basically just covers my salary & gives me some travel money, and requires me to do a few extra meetings & seminars during the year. And, of course, looks good on paper. So, I'll take it, even if it provokes quite a bit of anxiety over whether I'm taking an opportunity from someone who is more deserving.
Monday, April 5, 2010
New recipe, and upcoming Ice Cream
It was another "meh" day, mostly good things happening, but it's still a struggle to not get caught up in some negative thinking & anxiety. I got to work extra early (7:30!), mounted my tissue on slides, and checked out some staining from last week - though I had to hunt around for a working fluorescence microscope.
I lost my battle with not-going-home-early, but I did get a little writing done on the introduction for one paper. This is the project I thought was done back in February, so I started writing the paper for publication. The methods section is done, the results are started, but I got side-tracked with a lot of extra reading when I tried to write the intro. Unfortunately, one of my cases turned out to have extremely low numbers of labeled cells. So, back to the surgical suite. I just finished the preliminary immunochemical reactions on four more cases over the weekend, and will start the tissue for fluorescence tomorrow (along with the tissue for my other project!). So the next 10 weeks, probably, are going to be stressful & tedious :(
I have been working simultaneously on cleaning up my files. Since I've been in the lab, I've filled something like 7 lab notebooks, and they're organized chronologically, not by project. So I'm photocopying everything & re-organizing the copies by project, & will include digital data in the binders, so that things can be found easily when I'm no longer in the lab. I'm glad I've gotten started - but I'm several years behind, so it's not going to be easy.
In cleaning up my office over the last couple of weeks, I unearthed a bunch of recipes I had wanted to try. I had picked up some leeks to make soup earlier in the week, since I have a bunch of potatoes that should be used or planted real soon. But I found this, and was inspired to join Marce in her recent endeavors: a) using up canned & otherwise stockpiled food; and b) Monday beans.
I of course took liberties with the recipe. I had large leeks, so I tried to double the recipe, but then I didn't have enough beans, so it was a little leek heavy, which is fine by me. Also, I used whole milk instead of half&half. And didn't exactly measure it, I think I added a little more than 1 oz. My overall opinion:
1. Very easy to make :)
2. Eh, it was okay, but I think I like potato leek soup better. It wasn't so much soup as bean mush with leeks & mild bacon flavor. I definitely didn't add enough pepper, and it could've used some more salt too.
3. Drew approved, and he doesn't usually like potato leek soup (or, in general, cream soups. But I'm lucky in that he'll eat almost anything without complaint.) He does like beans more than I do though.
4. Maybe it would be better as a side-dish instead of the main event?
I still want to try more recipes from the site, and I like the idea of the blog, but I'll still go to Deborah Madison or this cookbook for ideas on particular vegetables (when I'm not feeling like Indian).
My next adventure will most likely be ice cream for Sunday's dinner. Drew's aunt is coming for a visit, so it's a special Sunday dinner, & the asparagus is in season, so I'll get to eat one of my favorite Marce-meals, Asparagus crepes. I haven't quite decided on what to make for frozen dessert, but I'm thinking citrus-y, either Cardamom Orange ice cream, or a sorbet (Orange or Tarragon Orange). I received an ice cream maker & ice cream recipe book a couple of years ago (for Christmas, maybe?), but have so far only tried the Cinnamon ice cream. That was delicious, but ice cream is actually enough of a pain to make (it's a two-day process) that I can see how it used to really be a treat!
Votes on frozen dessert flavors are encouraged in the comments (not limited to the flavors mentioned in the preceding paragraph)!
I lost my battle with not-going-home-early, but I did get a little writing done on the introduction for one paper. This is the project I thought was done back in February, so I started writing the paper for publication. The methods section is done, the results are started, but I got side-tracked with a lot of extra reading when I tried to write the intro. Unfortunately, one of my cases turned out to have extremely low numbers of labeled cells. So, back to the surgical suite. I just finished the preliminary immunochemical reactions on four more cases over the weekend, and will start the tissue for fluorescence tomorrow (along with the tissue for my other project!). So the next 10 weeks, probably, are going to be stressful & tedious :(
I have been working simultaneously on cleaning up my files. Since I've been in the lab, I've filled something like 7 lab notebooks, and they're organized chronologically, not by project. So I'm photocopying everything & re-organizing the copies by project, & will include digital data in the binders, so that things can be found easily when I'm no longer in the lab. I'm glad I've gotten started - but I'm several years behind, so it's not going to be easy.
In cleaning up my office over the last couple of weeks, I unearthed a bunch of recipes I had wanted to try. I had picked up some leeks to make soup earlier in the week, since I have a bunch of potatoes that should be used or planted real soon. But I found this, and was inspired to join Marce in her recent endeavors: a) using up canned & otherwise stockpiled food; and b) Monday beans.
I of course took liberties with the recipe. I had large leeks, so I tried to double the recipe, but then I didn't have enough beans, so it was a little leek heavy, which is fine by me. Also, I used whole milk instead of half&half. And didn't exactly measure it, I think I added a little more than 1 oz. My overall opinion:
1. Very easy to make :)
2. Eh, it was okay, but I think I like potato leek soup better. It wasn't so much soup as bean mush with leeks & mild bacon flavor. I definitely didn't add enough pepper, and it could've used some more salt too.
3. Drew approved, and he doesn't usually like potato leek soup (or, in general, cream soups. But I'm lucky in that he'll eat almost anything without complaint.) He does like beans more than I do though.
4. Maybe it would be better as a side-dish instead of the main event?
I still want to try more recipes from the site, and I like the idea of the blog, but I'll still go to Deborah Madison or this cookbook for ideas on particular vegetables (when I'm not feeling like Indian).
My next adventure will most likely be ice cream for Sunday's dinner. Drew's aunt is coming for a visit, so it's a special Sunday dinner, & the asparagus is in season, so I'll get to eat one of my favorite Marce-meals, Asparagus crepes. I haven't quite decided on what to make for frozen dessert, but I'm thinking citrus-y, either Cardamom Orange ice cream, or a sorbet (Orange or Tarragon Orange). I received an ice cream maker & ice cream recipe book a couple of years ago (for Christmas, maybe?), but have so far only tried the Cinnamon ice cream. That was delicious, but ice cream is actually enough of a pain to make (it's a two-day process) that I can see how it used to really be a treat!
Votes on frozen dessert flavors are encouraged in the comments (not limited to the flavors mentioned in the preceding paragraph)!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
OMG, I have great Indian cookbooks.
It's a sad fact that it takes me a couple of weeks to actually cook something once I think of the recipe. Generally, I buy most of the ingredients for a recipe, but not all of them, then don't make it to the store again for another week, and by then things are starting to turn south.
Luckily, there are frozen veggies & I do manage to keep us stocked in onions and garlic. And, I stocked up on Indian spices & dal (various kinds) last year, when I cashed in my yearly Amazon gc for these two books:
Healthy South Indian Cooking, by Alamelu Vairavan and Patricia Marquardt
and
An Invitation to Indian Cooking, by Madhur Jaffrey
Best. Purchase. Ever.
I love Indian food, but there is no place here in Pittsburgh that either: 1) is really great; or 2)delivers to our neighborhood. Much less both. And, it's cheaper to cook for us than to eat out all the time. And less greasy.
Plus, we get awesome lunch the next day.
So, I'd been planning to make Eggplant Masala (really good) from HSIC (see above), but ended up using the eggplant I bought to make homemade Baba Ghanouj (from a different cookbook - Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone by Deborah Madison (my Bible of Vegetarian)). We brought a middle eastern feast to a friends' house for an Equinox party on Saturday, and ate all the leftovers last night.
But back to Indian food. I know Drew loves Biryani, so I planned around that. Frozen chicken breasts? On sale at Giant Eagle, I think 1.79/lb for 3 lbs? Check. Cashews? I bought those too, but won't say how much I paid. Raisins? Check.
The instructions for chicken biryani have you make something else first - Garlic & Pepper Chicken (HSIC). So I made this tonight, along with Green Beans Poriyal.
Garlic Pepper & Chicken
paraphrased from HSIC
I used 3 lbs of chicken, and so had to multiply everything by 1.5 to make it even out. When I cook, I often estimate, so everything is sort of variable (I swear, I do not do this with science recipes). Cut the chicken up into medium (on the small side) pieces. Roughly chop up ~ 15 cloves of garlic. Chop up 1 med-lg onion, probably about 1 cup chopped. Measure out the following, preparing little cups/piles of spices (so you can throw spices in quickly while cooking!): 1) 5 small pieces of stick cinnamon, 2 bay leaves (crumbled), 4 dried chilis (I used Sanaam India Chili Peppers from Penzey's); 2) 1 tsp cumin seeds (I didn't have these so I skipped them), 3/4 tsp fennel seeds, 1.5 tsp urad dal; 3) 2 tsp ground black pepper, 2 tsp cumin powder, 2 tsp salt, 1.5 tsp curry powder, 1 tsp cayenne powder, 1/4 C chopped fresh coriander. Also put the garlic & onion together to be added at once. Finally, mince 2 tbsp on ginger root.
Heat 3 tbsp of canola oil in large skillet (I use my two handled Calphalon cast iron pan (thanks Kristen & Al!). When oil is hot, but not smoking*, add cinnamon sticks, bay leaf, & chili peppers (Group 1 above). Add cumin seeds, fennel seeds, and urad dal (Group 2 above). Add onion & garlic. Saute 3-4 mins & stir in 1 tsp turmeric powder. Add chicken & ginger. Cook covered over low heat until the chicken is partially cooked.
Add black pepper, etc. (Group 3 above). Stir well to coat chicken pieces. Add 1/2 cup of water, stir & recover. Cook over medium heat for 15 minutes. When done, serve over rice (Jasmine or Basmati - we used white Basmati tonight, but often we go for the brown Basmati, done in a rice cooker).
I tried some at this point, and it was already good, but I cut my chicken pieces to large, so it needed more cooking. Also, I was behind on the other parts of the meal, and the sauce was a little watery, so I turned the heat down a little, and recovered.
In the end, this was really tasty, but I definitely should have gone smaller on the meat pieces.
I also made Green Beans Poriyal (almost verbatim from Healthy South Indian Cooking, by Alamelu Vairavan and Patricia Marquardt
)
Again, keep in mind that things happend quickly when you start - so it helps a lot to group the spices together in small dishes. Silicone cupcake holders actually work really well for this purpose (thanks Mom!). However, I will let you sort out what goes with what :)
Boil 2 cups water, add 1/4 cup yellow split peas & 1/4 tsp turmeric powder. Cook over medium heat, uncovered, for 20 minutes, or until peas are done. Drain & set aside. Or, if you're like me, you'll start the next step before the peas are done, end up draining them too soon, then trying to figure out how to cook them just a bit more after you've already added them to the green beans.
Heat 2 tbsp canola oil (I used 1.5, as I had just reseasoned my other cast iron skillet, I figured I needed less oil) in a skillet over medium heat. When oil is hot, but not smoking**, throw in 1 tsp black mustard seeds and 2 tsp urad dal. Stir very quickly to distribute these through the oil, then cover and heat until the mustard seeds pop. When the popping slows/stops, uncover and add 16 oz. frozen green beans. You could use fresh, which is what the original recipe called for, but mine went bad, so I used back-up supplies. If you use frozen, watch out when you put them in, since the moisture + really hot oil doesn't always end well. Add 1 tsp minced fresh ginger, stir, and cook 1-2 mins over medium heat. Add 1 tsp salt & 1/2 tsp chutney powder*** and stir. Cover the whole thing & cook over low heat for 5 minutes.
Add cooked split peas & 1/4 cup powdered coconut. Mix well & remove from heat, covered, until ready to serve. Or, when you suspect the split peas aren't cooked, add ~ 1/4 cup of water to the whole thing, cover, & cook on low heat for another 8-10 minutes. You have the time, because you forgot to actually turn the rice cooker on, so you've got another 20 minutes before dinner. Pour youself a glass of wine, do some dishes, or just catch up with your SO while you wait.
* This is how every single recipe in this book starts. Pretty much.
** Ha! Told you.
*** I don't have this. I don't even have any idea what it is.
Luckily, there are frozen veggies & I do manage to keep us stocked in onions and garlic. And, I stocked up on Indian spices & dal (various kinds) last year, when I cashed in my yearly Amazon gc for these two books:
Healthy South Indian Cooking, by Alamelu Vairavan and Patricia Marquardt
and
An Invitation to Indian Cooking, by Madhur Jaffrey
Best. Purchase. Ever.
I love Indian food, but there is no place here in Pittsburgh that either: 1) is really great; or 2)delivers to our neighborhood. Much less both. And, it's cheaper to cook for us than to eat out all the time. And less greasy.
Plus, we get awesome lunch the next day.
So, I'd been planning to make Eggplant Masala (really good) from HSIC (see above), but ended up using the eggplant I bought to make homemade Baba Ghanouj (from a different cookbook - Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone by Deborah Madison (my Bible of Vegetarian)). We brought a middle eastern feast to a friends' house for an Equinox party on Saturday, and ate all the leftovers last night.
But back to Indian food. I know Drew loves Biryani, so I planned around that. Frozen chicken breasts? On sale at Giant Eagle, I think 1.79/lb for 3 lbs? Check. Cashews? I bought those too, but won't say how much I paid. Raisins? Check.
The instructions for chicken biryani have you make something else first - Garlic & Pepper Chicken (HSIC). So I made this tonight, along with Green Beans Poriyal.
Garlic Pepper & Chicken
paraphrased from HSIC
I used 3 lbs of chicken, and so had to multiply everything by 1.5 to make it even out. When I cook, I often estimate, so everything is sort of variable (I swear, I do not do this with science recipes). Cut the chicken up into medium (on the small side) pieces. Roughly chop up ~ 15 cloves of garlic. Chop up 1 med-lg onion, probably about 1 cup chopped. Measure out the following, preparing little cups/piles of spices (so you can throw spices in quickly while cooking!): 1) 5 small pieces of stick cinnamon, 2 bay leaves (crumbled), 4 dried chilis (I used Sanaam India Chili Peppers from Penzey's); 2) 1 tsp cumin seeds (I didn't have these so I skipped them), 3/4 tsp fennel seeds, 1.5 tsp urad dal; 3) 2 tsp ground black pepper, 2 tsp cumin powder, 2 tsp salt, 1.5 tsp curry powder, 1 tsp cayenne powder, 1/4 C chopped fresh coriander. Also put the garlic & onion together to be added at once. Finally, mince 2 tbsp on ginger root.
Heat 3 tbsp of canola oil in large skillet (I use my two handled Calphalon cast iron pan (thanks Kristen & Al!). When oil is hot, but not smoking*, add cinnamon sticks, bay leaf, & chili peppers (Group 1 above). Add cumin seeds, fennel seeds, and urad dal (Group 2 above). Add onion & garlic. Saute 3-4 mins & stir in 1 tsp turmeric powder. Add chicken & ginger. Cook covered over low heat until the chicken is partially cooked.
Add black pepper, etc. (Group 3 above). Stir well to coat chicken pieces. Add 1/2 cup of water, stir & recover. Cook over medium heat for 15 minutes. When done, serve over rice (Jasmine or Basmati - we used white Basmati tonight, but often we go for the brown Basmati, done in a rice cooker).
I tried some at this point, and it was already good, but I cut my chicken pieces to large, so it needed more cooking. Also, I was behind on the other parts of the meal, and the sauce was a little watery, so I turned the heat down a little, and recovered.
In the end, this was really tasty, but I definitely should have gone smaller on the meat pieces.
I also made Green Beans Poriyal (almost verbatim from Healthy South Indian Cooking, by Alamelu Vairavan and Patricia Marquardt
)
Again, keep in mind that things happend quickly when you start - so it helps a lot to group the spices together in small dishes. Silicone cupcake holders actually work really well for this purpose (thanks Mom!). However, I will let you sort out what goes with what :)
Boil 2 cups water, add 1/4 cup yellow split peas & 1/4 tsp turmeric powder. Cook over medium heat, uncovered, for 20 minutes, or until peas are done. Drain & set aside. Or, if you're like me, you'll start the next step before the peas are done, end up draining them too soon, then trying to figure out how to cook them just a bit more after you've already added them to the green beans.
Heat 2 tbsp canola oil (I used 1.5, as I had just reseasoned my other cast iron skillet, I figured I needed less oil) in a skillet over medium heat. When oil is hot, but not smoking**, throw in 1 tsp black mustard seeds and 2 tsp urad dal. Stir very quickly to distribute these through the oil, then cover and heat until the mustard seeds pop. When the popping slows/stops, uncover and add 16 oz. frozen green beans. You could use fresh, which is what the original recipe called for, but mine went bad, so I used back-up supplies. If you use frozen, watch out when you put them in, since the moisture + really hot oil doesn't always end well. Add 1 tsp minced fresh ginger, stir, and cook 1-2 mins over medium heat. Add 1 tsp salt & 1/2 tsp chutney powder*** and stir. Cover the whole thing & cook over low heat for 5 minutes.
Add cooked split peas & 1/4 cup powdered coconut. Mix well & remove from heat, covered, until ready to serve. Or, when you suspect the split peas aren't cooked, add ~ 1/4 cup of water to the whole thing, cover, & cook on low heat for another 8-10 minutes. You have the time, because you forgot to actually turn the rice cooker on, so you've got another 20 minutes before dinner. Pour youself a glass of wine, do some dishes, or just catch up with your SO while you wait.
* This is how every single recipe in this book starts. Pretty much.
** Ha! Told you.
*** I don't have this. I don't even have any idea what it is.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Rollercoaster
Wow, grad school really stinks emotionally. I've been up and down on a daily basis the last few days, and kind of crippled by how hopeless my situation feels. I think alot of the drama is coming from the uncertainty that lies ahead of me - another move to a new place, a whole new set of people to get to know and work with - and I knew I would be anxious about it, but just had forgotten what this feels like. And on top of the stress-to-get-finished, it's getting the better of me.
I finished counting all the cells I needed to for Project #3, and made up tables, and wrote the Methods section of the manuscript for it. But when I looked at my numbers, one of my cases stood out as having really low numbers. I think it's because I lost a section or two from the LDT, where the greatest concentration of these cells are. So, at the least, I have to run more immuno on this project, and count a whole nother* set of cells (rrggghhhh, I thought I was done!). At the most, I may end up having to do more surgery anyway. And then more immuno, and then more counting.
Meanwhile, the other project I have has completely imploded, one of the antibodies isn't working right at all, and the microscope I need is broken. So, zero progress on that one.
I think I've gotten better at dealing with these kinds of frustrations, but at this point, I'm just wondering when it's going to end. I mean, it has to at some point, right? But I just can't imagine what that will be like.
So, I'll keep working at it, I will greatly enjoy the few days off I'm taking in April, and, hopefully I will graduate sometime before the end of the fall.
* why isn't this grammatically correct?
I finished counting all the cells I needed to for Project #3, and made up tables, and wrote the Methods section of the manuscript for it. But when I looked at my numbers, one of my cases stood out as having really low numbers. I think it's because I lost a section or two from the LDT, where the greatest concentration of these cells are. So, at the least, I have to run more immuno on this project, and count a whole nother* set of cells (rrggghhhh, I thought I was done!). At the most, I may end up having to do more surgery anyway. And then more immuno, and then more counting.
Meanwhile, the other project I have has completely imploded, one of the antibodies isn't working right at all, and the microscope I need is broken. So, zero progress on that one.
I think I've gotten better at dealing with these kinds of frustrations, but at this point, I'm just wondering when it's going to end. I mean, it has to at some point, right? But I just can't imagine what that will be like.
So, I'll keep working at it, I will greatly enjoy the few days off I'm taking in April, and, hopefully I will graduate sometime before the end of the fall.
* why isn't this grammatically correct?
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
New efforts
I don't make resolutions. I think the only New Year's resolution I've ever made is to quit smoking, but that never generally even gets out of the gate. I might have once resolved to stop gossiping; unfortunately, progress on that one has been slow as well.
But I think I still manage to challenge myself in a lot of ways. I always joke at work that science was my worst subject in school, but it's actually true. I'm not really of fan of academic pursuit, yet continue in that path because I feel the training is necessary. I bought a house that has turned out to be a constant challenge (administrative and constructive), and it is probably beyond my actual abilities to renovate (but we'll get there anyway, it'll just cost more than we were prepared for in the beginning). I've studied two foreign languages (and am trying to pick up my third), moved to new and completely unfamiliar places, and pretty consistently picked the hardest options I could find, school/career-wise. There are times when I really wonder what is wrong with me when I look back upon the choices that have led me to where I am in life, but secretly, I am pretty pleased with things. I obviously don't make horrible life choices, but the benefits from them can be difficult to point out.
My newest venture has been a return to knitting. I received some bamboo needles as a gift a few months ago, and I dropped into Michael's** on a whim a couple of weeks back. I picked up a book of sweater patterns, and some yarn, plus some extra yarn that I liked & that had a hat pattern on the back of the label. All the patterns seemed pretty simple, and since I've only ever previously knitted rectangular things, I figured they would be a good next step.
I started a simple sweater last week, and immediately discovered that my casting-on technique is not actually right. Also, I didn't remember how to purl correctly. And I never learned how to read knitting patterns. Thankfully, the internet is here. So, I've had remedial knitting learning, and learned to increase stitches across a row. Here's what I have so far:
It's the back section, and once it's 15.5" long, I have to start doing something else, "binding off" maybe? In the end, it should look like this:
At the very least, I should have a new sweater in about two years :)
**Incidentally, that place has now been added to my mental list of dangerous stores (e.g. Target, Ikea) that always end up costing multiples of the amount you thought you were going to spend. On the plus side, I picked up some Nephew gifts that I think are pretty cool, and my "Christmas box" now is packed full of stuff that can be given when I can't think of anything in December.
But I think I still manage to challenge myself in a lot of ways. I always joke at work that science was my worst subject in school, but it's actually true. I'm not really of fan of academic pursuit, yet continue in that path because I feel the training is necessary. I bought a house that has turned out to be a constant challenge (administrative and constructive), and it is probably beyond my actual abilities to renovate (but we'll get there anyway, it'll just cost more than we were prepared for in the beginning). I've studied two foreign languages (and am trying to pick up my third), moved to new and completely unfamiliar places, and pretty consistently picked the hardest options I could find, school/career-wise. There are times when I really wonder what is wrong with me when I look back upon the choices that have led me to where I am in life, but secretly, I am pretty pleased with things. I obviously don't make horrible life choices, but the benefits from them can be difficult to point out.
My newest venture has been a return to knitting. I received some bamboo needles as a gift a few months ago, and I dropped into Michael's** on a whim a couple of weeks back. I picked up a book of sweater patterns, and some yarn, plus some extra yarn that I liked & that had a hat pattern on the back of the label. All the patterns seemed pretty simple, and since I've only ever previously knitted rectangular things, I figured they would be a good next step.
I started a simple sweater last week, and immediately discovered that my casting-on technique is not actually right. Also, I didn't remember how to purl correctly. And I never learned how to read knitting patterns. Thankfully, the internet is here. So, I've had remedial knitting learning, and learned to increase stitches across a row. Here's what I have so far:
It's the back section, and once it's 15.5" long, I have to start doing something else, "binding off" maybe? In the end, it should look like this:
At the very least, I should have a new sweater in about two years :)
**Incidentally, that place has now been added to my mental list of dangerous stores (e.g. Target, Ikea) that always end up costing multiples of the amount you thought you were going to spend. On the plus side, I picked up some Nephew gifts that I think are pretty cool, and my "Christmas box" now is packed full of stuff that can be given when I can't think of anything in December.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
A new Nissan
So, my friend Kate defended her thesis on Thursday, after two cancellations, and is now a Dr. She's on her way to Chicago, IL even as we speak, to move into a new apartment before starting her new job at Northwestern. I'm so proud of her (she's been like a sister to me here in Pgh), but pretty bummed out that she's no longer next door to my lab :(
However, she wanted to unload her car before moving to a bigger, more expensive, and better served by mass transit city. She has (had) a '95 200SX, standard, with ~80k miles on it. So, since our Nissan is a '91 with 268,000 miles, I figured it would be worth the upgrade (and I think we're trading the old one to our electrician for some work). Plus, Nashville seems like a drive-everywhere kind of city, so I will eventually need a car.
Friday, Kate and I took a trip to Motor Square Garden, an old train station that now houses a AAA service center, and a branch of the DMV. We transferred the title, and I got it registered at the same time. It's still a beater kind of car, but it looks better from the outside, and the things wrong with are different than the ones in our current car (and in both cases, the engine is great & reliable).
In other good news, our roommate has finally moved out. There was some unpleasantness over some utility bills, and I'm pretty ashamed to admit I lost my temper (and ended up not getting anything for the utilities), but it is so nice to have my kitchen back to myself that the money seems insignificant in comparison. Of course, he left a bunch of crap here too, but the main thing is that I will never again have to stand with a forced smile and listen to him explain how he's much smarter than everyone else, to clean his filth-encrusted dishes, to see, hear or smell him ... ever again. I am mainly struggling to let go of the anger I feel at having our generosity taken advantage of, and the confusion I feel over whether I overreacted or not.
A large part of my reaction was simply exasperation with dealing with him. (This is the guy who made a point of telling me that he couldn't find "his" dental floss - when there's 5 different ones in the bathroom, and each cost like 89 cents. Simply suppressing the eye rolls on a daily basis required a lot of mental effort.) But at the same time, he had told me plenty of stories demonstrating how he put one over on other people (so to speak), and there've been several problems with getting the rent check from him (lost in the mail, "my finger slipped and that's why it wasn't the right amount, just plain late), so needless to say, I don't have much faith in his good intentions. But everything was just co-incidental enough to support a more innocuous interpretation, and let me think I was being unfair. I certainly have the tendency to overreact, and am a bit overly sensitive to getting screwed over. So, a lot of back and forth in my own mind over how and why I react the way that I do. Hopefully, I will learn something from this, if only how much I am really over the whole roommate thing. Who knows, maybe he'll become a little more considerate of other people because of it too.
However, she wanted to unload her car before moving to a bigger, more expensive, and better served by mass transit city. She has (had) a '95 200SX, standard, with ~80k miles on it. So, since our Nissan is a '91 with 268,000 miles, I figured it would be worth the upgrade (and I think we're trading the old one to our electrician for some work). Plus, Nashville seems like a drive-everywhere kind of city, so I will eventually need a car.
Friday, Kate and I took a trip to Motor Square Garden, an old train station that now houses a AAA service center, and a branch of the DMV. We transferred the title, and I got it registered at the same time. It's still a beater kind of car, but it looks better from the outside, and the things wrong with are different than the ones in our current car (and in both cases, the engine is great & reliable).
In other good news, our roommate has finally moved out. There was some unpleasantness over some utility bills, and I'm pretty ashamed to admit I lost my temper (and ended up not getting anything for the utilities), but it is so nice to have my kitchen back to myself that the money seems insignificant in comparison. Of course, he left a bunch of crap here too, but the main thing is that I will never again have to stand with a forced smile and listen to him explain how he's much smarter than everyone else, to clean his filth-encrusted dishes, to see, hear or smell him ... ever again. I am mainly struggling to let go of the anger I feel at having our generosity taken advantage of, and the confusion I feel over whether I overreacted or not.
A large part of my reaction was simply exasperation with dealing with him. (This is the guy who made a point of telling me that he couldn't find "his" dental floss - when there's 5 different ones in the bathroom, and each cost like 89 cents. Simply suppressing the eye rolls on a daily basis required a lot of mental effort.) But at the same time, he had told me plenty of stories demonstrating how he put one over on other people (so to speak), and there've been several problems with getting the rent check from him (lost in the mail, "my finger slipped and that's why it wasn't the right amount, just plain late), so needless to say, I don't have much faith in his good intentions. But everything was just co-incidental enough to support a more innocuous interpretation, and let me think I was being unfair. I certainly have the tendency to overreact, and am a bit overly sensitive to getting screwed over. So, a lot of back and forth in my own mind over how and why I react the way that I do. Hopefully, I will learn something from this, if only how much I am really over the whole roommate thing. Who knows, maybe he'll become a little more considerate of other people because of it too.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Offer Letter
Greetings from lovely State of Emergency Pittsburgh!
We got pounded on Friday night through Saturday afternoon with 21-ish inches of snow. It was amazing how fast it was coming down on Friday night, and I was lucky enough to get home at 6:45 pm, and decided not to go out again, even though I had plans to go to a good-bye/send-off party for a scientist friend who is taking a job with a pharmaceutical company. I was sad to miss the party, but we live pretty far away from most of the other science-crew, and there is the formidable hill that we live on, a large bridge over a very large river, and a lot of less-formidable hills in between our house & all the East End destinations. Though we have brand new tires on the Nissan, it is, as D would call it, "one-wheel drive", and I have no interest in getting stranded or in any kind of accident. So we stayed put, and watched it come down :)
Saturday morning, I started suiting up to get ahead of the shoveling. It was still snowing just as hard. D thought I was crazy, & tried to argue that no-one else would be shoveling. Thankfully, one of my neighbors was out doing his steps, so I used this as counter-argument. The stairs and walkway weren't bad, but I quickly ran out of room to place snow in. And there was still the car to contend with.
I had no plans to drive anytime soon, but I remembered what happened a couple of winters ago, when snow was not removed from the car, everything melted a little bit, and then it snap froze again in the evening. The car was encased in ice for days, and we eventually just had to chip it off. It took hours.
Plus, the plows that cleared Arlington (thank you Mt. Oliver!) left a huge plow roll between the parked cars and the street. I am honestly not complaining about this, as we were very lucky to get the street cleared at all - the city of Pittsburgh maintained roads are awful, and the city is pretty crippled right now - but shoveling enough of that out of the way so that we will be able to get the car out took 3 separate sessions, over the whole day. There are mountains of snow & road sludge both in front of and behind the car, with just enough of the sides shaved off that its still possible to parallel park. It was a nice day though, and there were families walking up and down the street to get supplies at the corner store, and I chatted with quite a few neighbors on my frequent breaks. Once it stopped snowing, it was bright and sunny, and it was nice to be out in the fresh air.
I did take the car out Sunday, and discovered the condition of the Pittsburgh roads. Strangely enough, the windy road down the formidable hill was fine, a little slushy, but not slippery, and most people were driving sensibly (not all, but most). Then I hit the South Side flats. They had not been plowed at all. The snow/ice/dirt/slush was packed 6 inches thick, except in places where it plunged into a pothole. I was driving ~ 5 mph in first gear, and the car was still starting to slide a little. Twice my tires spun after a full stop, so I kept to backroads and only came to a full stop if there were other cars or people at the intersection. I'm glad I managed to get food (especially since I made stew & soup today), but I skipped the wine store in favor of getting home before it got any colder, and everything froze. I got home fine though, and am not taking the car out again until all this stuff melts.
My university was closed today, since bus service is not fully operational yet, and the roads are a nightmare. So, I made the aforementioned beef stew, and chicken soup (D's request), and then met my friend Spryte for some snow-day fun (she spent 2 hours trying to get to work, then trying to get home once she gave up). Walking up and down the hill was actually pretty okay, not to slippery & didn't take too long, but I really wish I owned some waterproof boots. I'm going to trek into work tomorrow (with dry shoes & socks to change into in my bag), even though they're officially still closed. I've run out of stuff to do at home, and want to take some more pictures, and coverslip some new sections.
In other news, I received my official offer letter via e-mail on Saturday. Well, it was sent Saturday, I didn't check e-mail until this evening (oops!). It's for more than I thought it was - which is a nice surprise. Also, I'm really nervous that I'm not going to live up to expectations. *sigh
We got pounded on Friday night through Saturday afternoon with 21-ish inches of snow. It was amazing how fast it was coming down on Friday night, and I was lucky enough to get home at 6:45 pm, and decided not to go out again, even though I had plans to go to a good-bye/send-off party for a scientist friend who is taking a job with a pharmaceutical company. I was sad to miss the party, but we live pretty far away from most of the other science-crew, and there is the formidable hill that we live on, a large bridge over a very large river, and a lot of less-formidable hills in between our house & all the East End destinations. Though we have brand new tires on the Nissan, it is, as D would call it, "one-wheel drive", and I have no interest in getting stranded or in any kind of accident. So we stayed put, and watched it come down :)
Saturday morning, I started suiting up to get ahead of the shoveling. It was still snowing just as hard. D thought I was crazy, & tried to argue that no-one else would be shoveling. Thankfully, one of my neighbors was out doing his steps, so I used this as counter-argument. The stairs and walkway weren't bad, but I quickly ran out of room to place snow in. And there was still the car to contend with.
I had no plans to drive anytime soon, but I remembered what happened a couple of winters ago, when snow was not removed from the car, everything melted a little bit, and then it snap froze again in the evening. The car was encased in ice for days, and we eventually just had to chip it off. It took hours.
Plus, the plows that cleared Arlington (thank you Mt. Oliver!) left a huge plow roll between the parked cars and the street. I am honestly not complaining about this, as we were very lucky to get the street cleared at all - the city of Pittsburgh maintained roads are awful, and the city is pretty crippled right now - but shoveling enough of that out of the way so that we will be able to get the car out took 3 separate sessions, over the whole day. There are mountains of snow & road sludge both in front of and behind the car, with just enough of the sides shaved off that its still possible to parallel park. It was a nice day though, and there were families walking up and down the street to get supplies at the corner store, and I chatted with quite a few neighbors on my frequent breaks. Once it stopped snowing, it was bright and sunny, and it was nice to be out in the fresh air.
I did take the car out Sunday, and discovered the condition of the Pittsburgh roads. Strangely enough, the windy road down the formidable hill was fine, a little slushy, but not slippery, and most people were driving sensibly (not all, but most). Then I hit the South Side flats. They had not been plowed at all. The snow/ice/dirt/slush was packed 6 inches thick, except in places where it plunged into a pothole. I was driving ~ 5 mph in first gear, and the car was still starting to slide a little. Twice my tires spun after a full stop, so I kept to backroads and only came to a full stop if there were other cars or people at the intersection. I'm glad I managed to get food (especially since I made stew & soup today), but I skipped the wine store in favor of getting home before it got any colder, and everything froze. I got home fine though, and am not taking the car out again until all this stuff melts.
My university was closed today, since bus service is not fully operational yet, and the roads are a nightmare. So, I made the aforementioned beef stew, and chicken soup (D's request), and then met my friend Spryte for some snow-day fun (she spent 2 hours trying to get to work, then trying to get home once she gave up). Walking up and down the hill was actually pretty okay, not to slippery & didn't take too long, but I really wish I owned some waterproof boots. I'm going to trek into work tomorrow (with dry shoes & socks to change into in my bag), even though they're officially still closed. I've run out of stuff to do at home, and want to take some more pictures, and coverslip some new sections.
In other news, I received my official offer letter via e-mail on Saturday. Well, it was sent Saturday, I didn't check e-mail until this evening (oops!). It's for more than I thought it was - which is a nice surprise. Also, I'm really nervous that I'm not going to live up to expectations. *sigh
Monday, February 1, 2010
I do wonder...
how it happens that I am expected/required to work all of my own experiments out, yet also required to do the initial legwork for other grad students (who are getting paid more than me through certain fellowships), and also explain an entirely new technique (that, although I've received excellent help from another faculty member with whom I orchestrated the interaction independently, I am not completely familiar with yet, although I have worked out how I'm going to analyze the data) to an undergraduate student who only has 3 months left in the lab.
It was a slightly irritating day, although I managed to get a few things accomplished, and decide on a plan of action for my dual fluorescence project. The staining for this worked great back when I prepared the slides in June, but the thing about fluorescence is that brain slices have a property called autofluorescence. And the fluorophore-conjugated antibodies eventually lose some of their signal. So, by the time I got done analyzing pilot data, those slides that looks so pretty in June were just messy. I tried imaging them back in December, and while one brain area looks analyzable, the second was just awful. So, I ordered more secondary antibodies, and ran my tissue again. This time the primary antibody didn't work. Today, I ordered more primary, and I'll give it another trial run at the end of this week. (Also, our fridge broke down sometime last week, and I and a post-doc had to deal with all of that. I'm now suspicious of my secondaries again. The ones I just bought last week. RRRggghhh.)
If I can get that going again, I'll be fine. Hopefully finish my data collection/analysis by the end of April, write my thesis in May + June, defend in July, clean up my lab notebooks, etc for the rest of July, and take August off. Because I get paid monthly, and lag behind a month, I should be able to take the time. I hope I can take the time, work on the house, work in the garden a little bit, just relax, before making the move to Nashville.
You all are probably lost, or stopped reading from boredom awhile ago. I need to start posting some pictures and/or slides so it's not just text-based science.
Well, hope you all have a good night. And I will try to post more later - but my calendar is full of work, chores, and social events for friends who are graduating/leaving town. Those of you who met Kate, she is defending on 2/10, and moving to Chicago the weekend after. Boo for me, but Yay!!! for her. I'm so proud of her, and can't wait to visit (and host her in Nashville once I move).
It was a slightly irritating day, although I managed to get a few things accomplished, and decide on a plan of action for my dual fluorescence project. The staining for this worked great back when I prepared the slides in June, but the thing about fluorescence is that brain slices have a property called autofluorescence. And the fluorophore-conjugated antibodies eventually lose some of their signal. So, by the time I got done analyzing pilot data, those slides that looks so pretty in June were just messy. I tried imaging them back in December, and while one brain area looks analyzable, the second was just awful. So, I ordered more secondary antibodies, and ran my tissue again. This time the primary antibody didn't work. Today, I ordered more primary, and I'll give it another trial run at the end of this week. (Also, our fridge broke down sometime last week, and I and a post-doc had to deal with all of that. I'm now suspicious of my secondaries again. The ones I just bought last week. RRRggghhh.)
If I can get that going again, I'll be fine. Hopefully finish my data collection/analysis by the end of April, write my thesis in May + June, defend in July, clean up my lab notebooks, etc for the rest of July, and take August off. Because I get paid monthly, and lag behind a month, I should be able to take the time. I hope I can take the time, work on the house, work in the garden a little bit, just relax, before making the move to Nashville.
You all are probably lost, or stopped reading from boredom awhile ago. I need to start posting some pictures and/or slides so it's not just text-based science.
Well, hope you all have a good night. And I will try to post more later - but my calendar is full of work, chores, and social events for friends who are graduating/leaving town. Those of you who met Kate, she is defending on 2/10, and moving to Chicago the weekend after. Boo for me, but Yay!!! for her. I'm so proud of her, and can't wait to visit (and host her in Nashville once I move).
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Vanderbilt
I know I promised to finish the Thanksgiving trek story next, but this is more fresh in my memory. Also, geesh, when am I going to cook something? It's been nothing but pizza and fend-for-yourself for quite awhile in these here parts. :)
Actually I'm enjoying some blackened catfish (good, but salty), white corn polenta with parmesan, and kale sauteed with onions even as we speak. But, back to my 2nd interview tale.
Back in October, when I attended the SFN conference in Chicago, I finally worked up the nerve to ask one of our collaborators about post-doc positions. I've had a lot of reservations about the whole post-doc thing, and I'm still not thrilled about the pay level, given how much education is required prior to this, but the non-academic job market has changed in the recent past. Many positions (of what's left; not too many people are actually hiring) now require 3-5 years of postdoctoral research, so it looks like I'm headed in that direction anyway. The thing is, this guy is a big deal in my field of research (and a few others as well), uses the techniques I think will be most helpful (and that address experimental questions I come up with), and has trained a lot of people who've gone on to become successful.
So I headed down there a couple of weekends ago, and got to see some of Nashville before the marathon interview. I got in on Saturday, visited with some friends from Pittsburgh (who moved down there last year for work), spent Sunday working & purchasing some last minute necessities to look put together on Monday for my talk, returned my rental car to the airport (needed it on Saturday), and got ready for dinner with the research group I would be working with.
At 5:40 pm, the interview started. 7 of us had dinner at a pretty good Thai restaurant, and I actually had a great time. The people were friendly, funny, and gave me the pros and cons of Nashville (most are explants from other areas) and Vanderbilt. I got back to the hotel around 9:30, and went back to work on my talk. This is the same talk I gave at NYU, but I had updated some of the data, and had to rework a few things for a different audience. I think I went to sleep around 12/12:30, and got up with plenty of time to spare.
Which is a good thing, b/c while I was in the shower, the head guy called to see if he could pick me up 15 minutes earlier. He managed to reach me after leaving me a message, and I agreed. So he picked me up at 8:15, we went to breakfast at a cool diner near campus, and then he gave me a quick walking tour on the way to the labs. Showed me around the various labs, then went to get set up for my talk at 10.
I got that out of the way (ugh, I don't like my own work, though I wasn't as nervous as last time, and since this will also end up being my thesis talk, I need the practice), and started meeting with people. Two senior lab techs/lab managers, four graduate students @ lunch, three post-docs, two junior lab techs and another grad student later, the head guy picked me up & took me to a hockey game (with a few other people from the lab). We talked a lot of science, but man, was that a long day (8 am till 10 pm straight).
Tuesday, I packed up my stuff, checked out of the hotel, and the head guy picked me up again for a few more meetings. We checked out a new microscope that Olympus was demonstrating that day (very cool, I wish I had one now; it would make my data collection much much quicker), then I met with the Postdoc affairs lady, another grad student, and had a meeting with the head guy before he drove me to the airport.
We left it open, with a soft deadline for me to accept or pass of by the end of February.
It's a great opportunity, but Nashville is certainly not somewhere I had on my radar. It is definitely in the South, financially about the same as Pittsburgh (okay, a little more expensive, but not much), and I heard several comments about church, so that would be a little different. I didn't state my beliefs outright, so I hope that doesn't become an issue. But it's also warm (yay!) and the research environment seems like a step in the right direction from where I am now.
D seems on board, even though it might be tough for him job-wise. I'm subtly suggesting he should go work at a vineyard, and learn how to make wine - but that's my daydream, I suppose. I do worry that this might not be the right step for us, but I think he wants me to go after what I need for my career. I also worry that I'll be a disappointing post-doc, but I don't think there's anything I can do about that unless it starts actually happening.
So it looks like I'll be moving to Tennessee, come September, assuming my thesis gets wrapped up without any further major snags.
Actually I'm enjoying some blackened catfish (good, but salty), white corn polenta with parmesan, and kale sauteed with onions even as we speak. But, back to my 2nd interview tale.
Back in October, when I attended the SFN conference in Chicago, I finally worked up the nerve to ask one of our collaborators about post-doc positions. I've had a lot of reservations about the whole post-doc thing, and I'm still not thrilled about the pay level, given how much education is required prior to this, but the non-academic job market has changed in the recent past. Many positions (of what's left; not too many people are actually hiring) now require 3-5 years of postdoctoral research, so it looks like I'm headed in that direction anyway. The thing is, this guy is a big deal in my field of research (and a few others as well), uses the techniques I think will be most helpful (and that address experimental questions I come up with), and has trained a lot of people who've gone on to become successful.
So I headed down there a couple of weekends ago, and got to see some of Nashville before the marathon interview. I got in on Saturday, visited with some friends from Pittsburgh (who moved down there last year for work), spent Sunday working & purchasing some last minute necessities to look put together on Monday for my talk, returned my rental car to the airport (needed it on Saturday), and got ready for dinner with the research group I would be working with.
At 5:40 pm, the interview started. 7 of us had dinner at a pretty good Thai restaurant, and I actually had a great time. The people were friendly, funny, and gave me the pros and cons of Nashville (most are explants from other areas) and Vanderbilt. I got back to the hotel around 9:30, and went back to work on my talk. This is the same talk I gave at NYU, but I had updated some of the data, and had to rework a few things for a different audience. I think I went to sleep around 12/12:30, and got up with plenty of time to spare.
Which is a good thing, b/c while I was in the shower, the head guy called to see if he could pick me up 15 minutes earlier. He managed to reach me after leaving me a message, and I agreed. So he picked me up at 8:15, we went to breakfast at a cool diner near campus, and then he gave me a quick walking tour on the way to the labs. Showed me around the various labs, then went to get set up for my talk at 10.
I got that out of the way (ugh, I don't like my own work, though I wasn't as nervous as last time, and since this will also end up being my thesis talk, I need the practice), and started meeting with people. Two senior lab techs/lab managers, four graduate students @ lunch, three post-docs, two junior lab techs and another grad student later, the head guy picked me up & took me to a hockey game (with a few other people from the lab). We talked a lot of science, but man, was that a long day (8 am till 10 pm straight).
Tuesday, I packed up my stuff, checked out of the hotel, and the head guy picked me up again for a few more meetings. We checked out a new microscope that Olympus was demonstrating that day (very cool, I wish I had one now; it would make my data collection much much quicker), then I met with the Postdoc affairs lady, another grad student, and had a meeting with the head guy before he drove me to the airport.
We left it open, with a soft deadline for me to accept or pass of by the end of February.
It's a great opportunity, but Nashville is certainly not somewhere I had on my radar. It is definitely in the South, financially about the same as Pittsburgh (okay, a little more expensive, but not much), and I heard several comments about church, so that would be a little different. I didn't state my beliefs outright, so I hope that doesn't become an issue. But it's also warm (yay!) and the research environment seems like a step in the right direction from where I am now.
D seems on board, even though it might be tough for him job-wise. I'm subtly suggesting he should go work at a vineyard, and learn how to make wine - but that's my daydream, I suppose. I do worry that this might not be the right step for us, but I think he wants me to go after what I need for my career. I also worry that I'll be a disappointing post-doc, but I don't think there's anything I can do about that unless it starts actually happening.
So it looks like I'll be moving to Tennessee, come September, assuming my thesis gets wrapped up without any further major snags.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Long Overdue Post on NY
So, what you all don't see is that my Drafts folder is full of half-started posts, none of which I ever returned to for purposes of, y'know, finishing them. What's even sadder is how often this could also be said of my actual work-work, my fiction writing (lifelong problem there), work on the house, etc. etc.
I seem to have a problem finishing alot of things that I start.
In any case, I believe I promised some comments on the New York visit, and have another job interview experience to describe as well. No pictures (of course!), but mostly I just sat in hotel rooms working on slides when I wasn't actually talking with other people.
First up is NYU. I missed my intended bus into Oakland that morning, and had to run into work anyway to check a couple of last minute things on the computer there/print out extra CVs. I realized as I was waiting for the Airport Shuttle that I was going to be cutting it too close at the airport, and managed to snag myself a cab instead at the Holiday Inn on campus. Some other time, I will explain what a feat this is in Pittsburgh, and the general dismal state of transportation-for-hire here in the Steel City.
I made it to the airport with plenty of time, and got all checked in. Then I found the special laptop charging bank of seats near the terminal and sat down to do some work. As usual, I had bitten off more than I could chew in terms of planning my talk, and was running a little behind on finishing up a few different things. I couldn't really do anything substantive at the airport, but I had to alter some superficial details of one set of graphs (combining datasets, changing fonts & symbol colors & size), and this was sufficiently mindless that I could do it even in my state of heightened anxiety, brought on by the impending interview.
When I got to Manhattan, my host greeted me at the nearby residence hotel, and loaned me her MoMA membership card. She also suggested I walk through Grand Central Station to view the famed ceiling. It sounded nice, but I was also anxious to get some work done & explained that my talk still needed work. At which point, I was told that I pretty much had the job if I wanted it, and the talk was just formality. I still wanted to do a good job, but I accepted the pass & decided to head uptown on foot for awhile, as my room wouldn't be ready for a couple of hours anyway.
I browsed the gift shop a little bit, since it was getting toward Christmastime, but the place was also mobbed with people, so I didn't end up buying anything. I did have a nice walk, and grabbed something to eat, but the experience left me a little flat. NYC used to be very exciting, if overwhelming, for me, but this time all I could notice was how little sky was visible. All of those buildings seem to crowd in overhead, and the sheer number of people just made me feel existentially lonely. If I'd thought about it, I might have decided right then that I couldn't live in NY, but I was still excited about the possibility I guess. In any case, there was a Dunkin Donuts 1/2 block from the hotel, so I was pretty happy regardless of what happened.
My host picked my up again for a fantastic dinner (fondue = yum!), thought the restaurant was little loud for the purposes of discussing science. Her postdoc was also very nice, but we realized at dinner that we had had some miscommunication. I was being considered for a fellowship that had a required start date of June 1, 2010, but my anticipated graduation had been shifted back since our last conversation, so we weren't sure whether I would make it in time.
We still proceeded the next day, but I certainly felt bad that I hadn't been clear enough in our e-mails. In any case, my host picked me up and took me to breakfast in the morning (after I was up until ~2 working on slides after dinner), my talk went okay, I met with a lot of scientists, and had a fun day talking science. At the very end (6:30 pm or so), and then I was put in a cab back to LaGuardia.
I just have to interject here that apparently cab drivers in New York have never heard of the law that they're supposed to take the way that you specify to get to the airport, so I never saw the inside of the Queens Tunnel, despite asking two different drivers to take that way. The second cab was a little scary, as the guy was yelling into his cellphone alot, and I had no idea where we were going for awhile, even while watching our progress on the GPS map in the back of the cab. But, he got me to the airport on time, for less than I was told it would cost via the tunnel, so I guess I can't complain.
And then my plane was delayed like 4.5 hours. RRgggh. LaGuardia is not a good airport to be stuck in. Though they do have a Dunkin Donuts cart, and I got to read Wicked, which was interesting.
I seem to have a problem finishing alot of things that I start.
In any case, I believe I promised some comments on the New York visit, and have another job interview experience to describe as well. No pictures (of course!), but mostly I just sat in hotel rooms working on slides when I wasn't actually talking with other people.
First up is NYU. I missed my intended bus into Oakland that morning, and had to run into work anyway to check a couple of last minute things on the computer there/print out extra CVs. I realized as I was waiting for the Airport Shuttle that I was going to be cutting it too close at the airport, and managed to snag myself a cab instead at the Holiday Inn on campus. Some other time, I will explain what a feat this is in Pittsburgh, and the general dismal state of transportation-for-hire here in the Steel City.
I made it to the airport with plenty of time, and got all checked in. Then I found the special laptop charging bank of seats near the terminal and sat down to do some work. As usual, I had bitten off more than I could chew in terms of planning my talk, and was running a little behind on finishing up a few different things. I couldn't really do anything substantive at the airport, but I had to alter some superficial details of one set of graphs (combining datasets, changing fonts & symbol colors & size), and this was sufficiently mindless that I could do it even in my state of heightened anxiety, brought on by the impending interview.
When I got to Manhattan, my host greeted me at the nearby residence hotel, and loaned me her MoMA membership card. She also suggested I walk through Grand Central Station to view the famed ceiling. It sounded nice, but I was also anxious to get some work done & explained that my talk still needed work. At which point, I was told that I pretty much had the job if I wanted it, and the talk was just formality. I still wanted to do a good job, but I accepted the pass & decided to head uptown on foot for awhile, as my room wouldn't be ready for a couple of hours anyway.
I browsed the gift shop a little bit, since it was getting toward Christmastime, but the place was also mobbed with people, so I didn't end up buying anything. I did have a nice walk, and grabbed something to eat, but the experience left me a little flat. NYC used to be very exciting, if overwhelming, for me, but this time all I could notice was how little sky was visible. All of those buildings seem to crowd in overhead, and the sheer number of people just made me feel existentially lonely. If I'd thought about it, I might have decided right then that I couldn't live in NY, but I was still excited about the possibility I guess. In any case, there was a Dunkin Donuts 1/2 block from the hotel, so I was pretty happy regardless of what happened.
My host picked my up again for a fantastic dinner (fondue = yum!), thought the restaurant was little loud for the purposes of discussing science. Her postdoc was also very nice, but we realized at dinner that we had had some miscommunication. I was being considered for a fellowship that had a required start date of June 1, 2010, but my anticipated graduation had been shifted back since our last conversation, so we weren't sure whether I would make it in time.
We still proceeded the next day, but I certainly felt bad that I hadn't been clear enough in our e-mails. In any case, my host picked me up and took me to breakfast in the morning (after I was up until ~2 working on slides after dinner), my talk went okay, I met with a lot of scientists, and had a fun day talking science. At the very end (6:30 pm or so), and then I was put in a cab back to LaGuardia.
I just have to interject here that apparently cab drivers in New York have never heard of the law that they're supposed to take the way that you specify to get to the airport, so I never saw the inside of the Queens Tunnel, despite asking two different drivers to take that way. The second cab was a little scary, as the guy was yelling into his cellphone alot, and I had no idea where we were going for awhile, even while watching our progress on the GPS map in the back of the cab. But, he got me to the airport on time, for less than I was told it would cost via the tunnel, so I guess I can't complain.
And then my plane was delayed like 4.5 hours. RRgggh. LaGuardia is not a good airport to be stuck in. Though they do have a Dunkin Donuts cart, and I got to read Wicked, which was interesting.
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